So I had a hard time getting into my blog, cause I haven't used it in quite some time. I go through these periods where I don't think I really need it. Well, I guess I do. I don't think other people are going through things also, and I don't know where I get these ideas that I am the only one, but apparently people hide it well. It makes me feel better knowing that others are going through similar issues. And I am not the only one who goes crazy, lol.
It is a Monday morning and I had a shitty wake up call. I woke up an hour later than I was supposed to and got the kids up late for school. I think I was in dream land or something thinking it was still the weekend. Boy was I wrong?!?! I wish it was, but reality set in, though I wish it hadn't. So I got the kids up, telling them we were late. They got up fairly easily and got dressed and came downstairs. Jess wasn't happy with what I put on her, cause she was so cold. I didn't blame her cause it has been so cold in this house. I was kinda upset that she asked me to change her, but I didn't want her to continue crying either. Devin had asked if I could make him breakfast..umm, no Devin you can make yourself breakfast. We are going to be late. I gave him the bennefit of the doubt for that one, cause I have been cooking breakfast on school mornings. It saves money and gets them a more nutritious breakfast than what the schools are giving them. After they started to eat their cereal, I asked them if they wanted a granola bar instead, and they agreed. We were out the door by 7:30 am and off to school. I know they must have been mad at me, but who can be perfect?
So I am sitting here in 'awe' cause I can't get myself organized or in the right mind-set to get the ball rolling. I need to clean and organize the house, cause once again it is in shambles. Just leave it for mom to clean up! I tell everyone every day to pick up the livingroom and clean up the kitchen cause I am not doing it for them. Well this morning the livingroom is my fault cause I slept on the couch. Ugh. Last night my feet were so freezing and hurting that I couldn't sleep in our bedroom. They are still hurting this morning. I had problems with my acheles tendon and it was so tender yesterday and bothering me. Then last night while trying to sleep, I guess the temperatures dropped and they were so cold. I wish I could warm them up some way. My arthritis has been bothering me so much lately. I know I should be getting out there to walk more, but sometimes I just don't get to it. So last night I got up and took some tylonol, made me some sleepy-time tea and covered in 2 warm blankets. Doubled my socks, and watched one of my recordings..Criminal Minds till I was tired and warm.
This morning as I am writing, my wrists are stiff and hurting, and feet/ankles are cold and the same. I am hoping Devin doesn't call from school saying he needs me to pick him up cause he isn't feeling good. I usually get this on Mondays. I am waiting for his doc to call me back so I can reschedule his appt. for tomorrow. I already have my appt. plus Jessicas student-led conference/book fair and pizza dinner at her school. I can't have much more than that.On Wed. I have my PAP smear. This time it was a year since I have had it, instead of 6 months like it has been. Lets hope everything is ok. I am going to ask for a dermatologist to check out the suspicious moles and the wierd growth on my head by my hairline. It is hard for me not to think of it as cancer, since my husband has got skin cancer and I have so mnky moles..one of them is bound to be cancerous. I am just so scared. I met my new doc at BAMC a couple weeks ago, and I really like her. It is rare that I meet a doc that I like. So now I don't have to be afraid to go see her. I just hope she stays.
We are still looking for a new vehicle for me. The van isn't going to last. We were supposed to go on Sat. but we were both so tired. I haven't been sleeping well, if at all lately and Jason has been working his butt off and working overtime on weekends. It is just crazy how he is working that much and doig so great and here I am being a stay-at-home mom, although still quite busy, but still stay at home and I can barely keep up with things. It is always something new with me. I give him credit for working cause I know that I can not do it. I can barely funtion. But I get to do the finances and am very good at it, whereas he says he is not. I am hoping to get 2 new vehicles and eventually get out of these town homes and live in luxury! Ok, maybe not in luxury, but a lot better than we are. Jason is getting paid a lot more than I thought and with my paying off bills and saving as much as we are, I think we are made! I soo want to get out of here and have a better place for the kids to play and hang out. Jess hardly gets to get out and play. We had a great time on Friday. She played with her school friends and I was hanging out with the dog on the back of the van getting some sun. I am so going to miss some things about the van, like how the seats in the back can lay down backwards and you can sit on the back like you are tailgating. Don't know how to explain it, but I remember going to the drive-in movies in lemoore with family and friends and sitting on the back of that thing with the kids, and it was so much fun. Oh how I miss that. Well, guess it is time to get my butt-a-rolling this morning. Have a good Monday everyone! I just hope my wrists start to defrost and can move easier.
